Keyword: Ireland

Geographically, Ireland is a medium-sized rural island that is slowly but steadily being consumed by sheep.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist

My dad is Irish and my mum is Iranian, which meant that we spent most of our family holidays in Customs.

(1969 – ) American singer-songwriter & musician

Ireland is a small but insuppressible island half an hour nearer the sunset than Great Britain.

(1880 – 1916) Irish economist, barrister, writer, soldier & politician

The Irish people do not gladly suffer common sense.

(1878 – 1957) Irish poet, author, athlete & politician

In Ireland the inevitable never happens and the unexpected constantly occurs.

(1839 – 1919) Irish writer

God is good to the Irish, but no one else is, not even the Irish.

(1858 – 1932) American physicist, physician & humorist

Order is an exotic in Ireland; it has been imported from England but it will not grow. It suits neither soil nor climate.

(1818 – 1894) English historian, novelist, biographer & editor

If one could only teach the English how to talk, and the Irish how to listen, society here would be quite civilized.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet

Even my blood type is O apostrophe.

comedian

The typical West of Ireland family consists of father, mother, twelve children and resident Dutch anthropologist.

(1911 – 1966) Irish novelist, dramatist & columnist

The English should give Ireland home rule – and reserve the motion picture rights.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator

That's still how Irish people are seen, as twinkly-eyed f**kers with a pig under their arm, high-stepping it around the world, going 'I'll paint your house now, but watch out, I might steal the ladder later, ohohoho!' – which is only half true!

(1971 – ) Irish comedian, actor & writer

The problem with Ireland is that it's a country full of genius, but with absolutely no talent.

(1926 – 2009) Irish dramatist, television writer & essayist

What you take for lying in an Irishman is only his attempt to put an herbaceous border on stark reality.

(1878 – 1957) Irish poet, author, athlete & politician

Given the unlikely options of attending a funeral or a sex orgy, a true Irishman will always opt for the funeral.

(1928 – 2002) Irish playwright, novelist & essayist

God is good to the Irish, but no one else is, not even the Irish.

(1858 – 1932) American physicist, physician & humorist

A Kerry footballer with an inferiority complex is one who thinks he’s just as good as everybody else.

(1928 – 2002) Irish playwright, novelist & essayist

My one claim to originality among Irishmen is that I never made a speech.

(1852 – 1933) Irish writer, poet, art critic & dramatist

God created alcohol just to stop the Irish from ruling the world.

(1956 – ) English actor

You know it is summer in Ireland when the rain gets warmer.

(1892 – 1992) American film & television producer & director

Given the unlikely options of attending a funeral or a sex orgy, a true Irishman will always opt for the funeral.

(1928 – 2002) Irish playwright, novelist & essayist