Masturbation | Just-One-Liners.com

Keyword: Masturbation

My mum walked in on me wanking and looking at her wedding pictures. "You perv!" she screamed at me.
It's not what you think, Mum… I was looking at the priest.

Stewart Francis

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer

Sex Masturbation

Self-abuse is the sincerest kind.

Solomon Short

David Gerrold (1944 – ) science fiction author

Activities Self Sex Masturbation

We got new advice as to what motivated man to walk upright… to free his hands for masturbation.

Jane Wagner

(1935 – ) screenwriter, author, director & producer

Sex Hands Masturbation Motivation

I’m not an expert on masturbation, but I hold my own.

Stewart Francis

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer

Sex Masturbation

The only reason I feel guilty about masturbation is because I do it so badly.

David Steinberg

(1942 – ) Canadian comedian, actor, writer, director & author

Sex Guilt Masturbation

I know I’m not sexy; in high school I was voted “Most Likely to Masturbate.”

Rodney Dangerfield

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor

Sex Masturbation

There’s nothing but porn on TV these days. I tell you, it makes me so angry, I sit on the end of my bed and shake my fist at it.

Stewart Francis

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer

Entertainment Television Masturbation Pornography

The good thing about masturbation is that you don't have to dress up for it.

Truman Capote

(1924 – 1984) American author

Appearance Clothing Sex Masturbation

Hannah: Excessive masturbation?
Mickey: You gonna start knockin’ my hobbies?

Woody Allen

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian

Sex TV/Movie Quotes As Mickey in “Hannah and Her Sisters” Masturbation

Masturbation is the thinking man’s television.

Christopher Hampton

(1946 – ) British playwright, screen writer & film director

Sex Masturbation

If you use the electric vibrator near water, you may come and go at the same time.

Louise Sammons

Sex Things Masturbation Vibrators

It is not enough to be abstinent with other people, you also have to be abstinent alone; the Bible says that lust in your heart is committing adultery…. you can’t masturbate without lust!

Christine O'Donnell

(1969 – ) U.S. Representative (Delaware)

Beliefs Misspokements Religion Sex Abstinence Masturbation

Hey, don’t knock masturbation. It’s sex with someone I love.

Woody Allen

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian

Sex TV/Movie Quotes As Alvy Singer in “Annie Hall” Masturbation

Diseases Caused by Masturbation

Dr. Samuel-Auguste

Book Titles Sex Masturbation

Meetings are an addictive, highly self-indulgent activity that corporations and other large organizations habitually engage in only because they cannot actually masturbate.

Dave Barry

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist

Activities People Sex Masturbation Meetings Organizations

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Keyword: Masturbation

Images You Should Not Masturbate To

Beat Your Way to the Top: Masturbation as a technique for business success

My mum walked in on me wanking and looking at her wedding pictures. "You perv!" she screamed at me.
It's not what you think, Mum… I was looking at the priest.

Self-abuse is the sincerest kind.

We got new advice as to what motivated man to walk upright… to free his hands for masturbation.

I’m not an expert on masturbation, but I hold my own.

The only reason I feel guilty about masturbation is because I do it so badly.

I know I’m not sexy; in high school I was voted “Most Likely to Masturbate.”

There’s nothing but porn on TV these days. I tell you, it makes me so angry, I sit on the end of my bed and shake my fist at it.

The good thing about masturbation is that you don't have to dress up for it.

Hannah: Excessive masturbation?
Mickey: You gonna start knockin’ my hobbies?

Masturbation is the thinking man’s television.

If you use the electric vibrator near water, you may come and go at the same time.

It is not enough to be abstinent with other people, you also have to be abstinent alone; the Bible says that lust in your heart is committing adultery…. you can’t masturbate without lust!

Hey, don’t knock masturbation. It’s sex with someone I love.

Diseases Caused by Masturbation

Meetings are an addictive, highly self-indulgent activity that corporations and other large organizations habitually engage in only because they cannot actually masturbate.