Keyword: Newspapers

Before marriage, a man declares that he would lay down his life to serve you; after marriage, he won’t even lay down his newspaper to talk to you.

(1876 – 1950) journalist & humorist
Communication Husbands Marriage Speech Time Wives

A newspaper is a circulating library with high blood pressure.

(1886 – 1969) American journalist & humorist
Communication Health Reading/Writing

A day without newspapers is like walking around without your pants on.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Misspokements Reading/Writing

No self-respecting fish would want to be wrapped in a [Rupert] Murdoch newspaper.

(1932 – 1997) newspaper columnist
Communication Insults Reading/Writing

Everything you read in the newspapers is absolutely true except for that rare story of which you happen to have firsthand knowledge.

Characteristics Communication Honesty Murphy’s Laws Truth

It's amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper.

(1954 – ) comedian & television actor
Reading/Writing

Never argue with a man who buys ink by the barrel.

Conflict Murphy’s Laws

Where ignorance is bliss it's foolish to borrow your neighbor's newspaper.

(1868 – 1930) cartoonist, humorist & journalist
Intelligence People Reading/Writing Stupidity

I am not the editor of a newspaper and shall always try to do right and be good so that God will not make me one.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Communication Occupations Work

The difference between burlesque and the newspapers is that the former never pretended to be performing a public service by exposure.

(1907 – 1989) American writer
Communication Reading/Writing

A newspaper is a device for making the ignorant more ignorant and the crazy crazier.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Communication Intelligence Reading/Writing

I think that people who read the tabloids deserve to be lied to.

(1954 – ) comedian & television actor
Communication Lies Reading/Writing

A newspaper consists of just the same number of words, whether there be any news in it or not.

(1707 – 1754) English dramatist & novelist
Communication Reading/Writing

People everywhere confuse what they read in newspapers with news.

(1904 – 1963) American journalist
Beliefs Communication Facts Reading/Writing

Newspapers are unable, seemingly, to discriminate between a bicycle accident and the collapse of civilization.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Communication

America is a country of inventors, and the greatest of inventors are the newspaper men.

(1847 – 1922) Scottish scientist, inventor, engineer & innovator
Beliefs Communication Opinion Reading/Writing

Press agent: How do I get our leading lady's name in your newspaper?
George S. Kaufman: Shoot her.

(1889 – 1961) Am. playwright, theater director & producer & humorist
Communication Entertainment Reading/Writing

With the newspaper strike on, I wouldn't consider dying.

(1908 – 1989) American actress of film, television & theater
Communication Death Reading/Writing

Everything you read in newspapers is absolutely true, except for that rare story of which you happen to have first-hand knowledge.

(1931–1994) American journalist
Communication Reading/Writing

I had a paper route when I was a kid and I was supposed to go to 2,000 houses… or two dumpsters.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Communication Work