Keyword: Swearing

Before I met her, I drank and swore without reason… now I have a reason.

(1924 – 1992) English comedian & actor
Alcohol Food/Drink People Situations

Some guy hit my fender and I said "be fruitful and multiply" but not in those words.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Accidents Autos Things

I used to go to the driving range to practice driving without slicing; now I go to the driving range to practice slicing without swearing.

(1941 – ) poet, author, editor & anthologist
Golf Sports

I sometimes throw in a couple of swears just to keep the Christian right off my tail; I wouldn’t want to be the tea party’s go-to comedian.

(1970 –) American stand-up comedian
Communication Language

Before I met her, I drank and swore without reason… now I have a reason.

(1924 – 1992) English comedian & actor
Alcohol Situations

Swearing was invented as a compromise between running away and fighting.

(1867 – 1936) author & humorist
Communication Language

Life’s disappointments are harder to take when you don’t know any swear words.

(1955 – ) cartoonist (Calvin and Hobbes)
Communication Speech

He went and blessed me out!

Miscellaneous

The reason they call if ‘golf’ is that all the other four-letter words were used up.

Golf Sports

You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.

Driving Murphy’s Laws

As my mother always says, “If you have to swear to get laughs, then you’re obviously a c**t.”

(1972 – ) Irish stand-up comedian, voice over artist & actor
Communication Emotions Laughter Speech

A gentleman never swears at his wife when ladies are present.

Characteristics Men People

I used to go to the driving range to practice driving without slicing; now I go to the driving range to practice slicing without swearing.

(1941 – ) poet, author, editor & anthologist
Communication Golf Speech Sports