Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Keyword:
Waiter
Waiter: A guy who believes money grows on a tray.
Anonymous
Definitions
Occupations
Work
Waiter
Everyone should have to wait tables for one year of their lives, so they realize their ranch dressing isn’t that fucking important.
Daniel Tosh
(1975 – ) American stand-up comedian & television host
Life
Occupations
People
Work
Waiter
A diplomat these days is nothing, but a head waiter who is allowed to sit down occasionally.
Peter Ustinov
(1921 – 2004) English actor & author
Government
Diplomats
Waiter
A cannibal is a person who walks into a restaurant and orders a waiter.
Morey Amsterdam
(1908 – 1996) actor & comedian
Food/Drink
People
Orders
Restaurant
Waiter
Beware the smile of a waiter… it means he's pissed in your soup.
Simon Munnery
(1967 – ) English comedian
Food/Drink
Situations
Waiter